Depression During Pregnancy
(I’m continuing to share my private journals from my 1st pregnancy.)
Well that was not my best Christmas. I was soooooo depressed. What’s wrong with me? I cried almost the whole time and Dan’s mom and sister thought I was nuts! Well, I was. Normally I’m a happy go lucky person, but not this time. I felt bad but I think I ruined their Christmas too. I hope I get over this depression soon. It must be the hormones but I really hate that I’m feeling so down gaining weight so quickly. (Somebody commented on it which made me feel even worse!)
I need to keep telling myself that it’s for the baby and just keep praying. I know that deep down I need to gain a good amount of weight but we all struggle with something and mine is weight.
Lord, please help me not to feel this way, I want to be happy about my pregnancy. I know this is a blessing from you and I will lean on you. Amen.
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Well sister in Christ I
Well sister in Christ I would like to offer a bit of support and wisdom that hopefully you will find helpful. Pregnancy can be a difficult journey for anyone involved. The child, the mother, those around that are immediately affected. It's a time of joy and a time of sadness. And most pregnancies aren't the easiest things to go through. I don't need to tell you all the things you already know about birth and God's reason for allowing us to continue our existence through pregnancies and the emotions that come along with it but one thing I will say is that before your unborn child Jesus died for you and God deems you as precious in His sight. Don't read into the cliche of "Jesus died for me" because you'll miss the point. Understand the great love of anyone to have the compassion for any person to the point that they would willingly give their life in exchange for yours. We are all undeserving of His infinite love and He chose you before you came into this world. And He's chosen your unborn child even before conception. He chose love over comfort. Dying isn't comfortable and Jesus took it all for us. That's the first revelation that we need to grasp. And I don't think we will ever fully grasp it. God wants to teach of love like His. But in order for us to learn to love like He does we must learn to love ourselves. Weight gain isn't an easy pill to swallow and it can easily distort our image of ourselves causing us to love ourselves less and you aren't capable of loving a beautiful child that God is blessing you with if you're refusing to first love yourself as a daughter of the king. The superficial is unimportant. What is important is the identity. Weight gain from pregnancy cannot change your identity. Who God says you are will always stay the same. Find peace in God and your identity in Him and pray for perseverance. Pray for peace in this pregnancy because it is a difficult period of your life but know that God is with you. Remind yourself everyday because if you don't you will often forget. And God doesn't want us to forget who we are. I'll stand in faith with you that the Lord will see you through. That Christ will raise your spirits and that you will continue to grow in Him with a renewed passion and vigor that can only be comprehended by Him.